50 Shades of Brett: Special Hearing Unit

“Democracy has been a bad girl; she needs to be punished.”

I would apologize for the HBO-posting, but on the other hand such things are already at saturation level.  Law and Order: Special Victims Unit, that rape-a-week special, is in its twentieth season – the longest running primetime scripted show after The Simpsons (and just ahead of Lassie).  That’s 436 rapes, so far, single-counting the gangbangs.

50 Shades of Gray is of course an immensely popular multi media phenomenon, evolving from shitty erotic vampire fanfiction to an empire of Hollywoodized light bondage.  The less said about its specifics, the better.

And the most salient example we have is the Handmaid “phenomenon”.  When a group of idiots elects to play dress-up as what they imagine Nazis to have been, there is not any inference but that they are advocating for similar ideological goals, or at least to hormetically detoxify those ideas.  When a group of woke women elects to wear costumes referring to an HBO soap opera where they are embedded in a strict hierarchy that obliges them to serve and bear the children of brutal patriarchs (but still get to bang the sexy valet on the side), well, it’s not too hard to see what’s going on.

You might very well draw from all these the conclusion that American women have a “complicated” relationship with rape.  Enough ink has been spilled on this. But the political saliency of this behavior as we see the Passion of Kegstand Brett completed with his ascension is less explored – how does this fascination play out in a political drama?

The Democratic voting constituency consists of, approximately, minorities and single white women.  It’s obvious that the parade of whores wheeled out days before the scheduled elevation of Kavanaugh to the Supreme Court, each one with a more incredible story than the last, was an attempt to juice the latter before the midterms.

But this ends up playing out similarly to the botched OJ Simpson prosecution, where feminist prosecutrix Marcia Clark stacked the jury with women she expected to be outraged at Simpson’s domestic violence.  In reality, for a sexually tinged crime you can do worse than a jury full of women, even (perhaps especially) if your client is guilty as sin – women tend to be more skeptical of poor widdle innocent girl narratives, and judge attempts to take out a sexy cad with a jaundiced eye.  A helping of racial solidarity doesn’t hurt either.  Kavanaugh is never going to appeal to the hardcore death row girlfriend constituency, but he does represent an ideal that still exists – the charismatic bad boy that doesn’t turn out to be bad after all, and brings his family with him to the highest level of social status.  Women do want to preserve access to such men.

This doesn’t imply they are actually making objectively good decisions – God knows, the primary concern of huge chunks of the SWF demographic is the ability to murder their children so as not to have to settle for their present baby daddy.  But it does imply that depending on their gender solidarity in judging a specific supposed sex fiend is a risky endeavor.  In as clear of a case of malign motivations as this, particularly when the hit job fails, it’s quite possible that the blowback eclipses the damage to the target.

The left, not known for their terribly deep levels of introspection, cannot conceive of this.  So they do things like run ridiculous editorial cartoons, eg the endlessly memeable image of a thin, white woman, presumptively Democracy, being held down and abused by a nasty, cufflink-denoted Republican.

(Halloween is just around the corner, and if you’re looking for a good couple’s costume, you could do worse.)

Let’s not forget that canonically Justice blinds herself, out of a surfeit of virtue, and arms herself with a sword, to punish the guilty.  This must be some other goddess, without the means to protect herself, the virtue to avoid pre judgment, or the foresight to avoid a compromising situation – but a talent for judging by raw mass.  In other words, Democracy.

Faced with the spectacle of young, blond, attractive Democracy, held down, blindfolded, about to be savaged on silk sheets by a man, well suited, powerful enough to disregard her wishes, my prediction of the midterm results is that the SWF electorate will have one question:

“Who exactly do I have to vote for to make this happen?”

One Comment Add yours

  1. GDR says:

    Please drop my extended sincere shitposts in the retweets if this goes viral, I ran out of SIM cards.


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