A Tale of Two Judges

Submitted by mongoose kikimora

Recently the amoral creature behind Bat in the Attic, Robert Conley, outed and cancelled the current owner of Judges Guild. To provide some background, Robert was displeased the aforementioned owner of an independent RPG module (premade story and scenario pack for tabletop role playing games) had displayed unacceptable levels of disapproval at our shtetl derived ruling class and approval of unallowed humor. Special note must be made of Robert’s particular moral fortitude, to quote him: “For now, I will keep up my Judges Guild related products up for sale. I currently have a unique situation in regards to the royalties I pay. Given the state of the Kickstarter finances, Robert Bledsaw II suspended the royalty payments in lieu of paying me for finishing the last nine maps. This has been going on since November of 2017 when I released the CSIO map. Since then, all revenue after taxes and expenses have gone to me.” Robert is completely willing to attempt to ruin his opponent, but only up to where his pocketbook is concerned.

While we are most certainly appraised of how liberalism subverts everything, this allows us both a window into how it mechanistically works, and into the ongoing assimilation of RPGs into our plastic neoliberal nerd culture.

It should be noted that in general, Liberalism utilizes this sort of treatment (total boycotting and divestment) only in cases of utmost priority, either when actual nahtzees are involved, or when the individual in question has control over whether or not they will be fired, in this case both were true. However, in the garden variety case, liberalism uses its most pernicious head, market liberalism to project power.

Let’s look at something a little larger than a little drama between Robert and Judge’s Guild. Let’s look at industry titan and household name Dungeons and Dragons. D&D is owned by Wizards of the Coast, who in turn also own trading card game giant Magic the Gathering. Wizards of the Coast itself is owned by Hasbro. With this large corporate status comes the usual capitalist HR department identity pandering, complete with ‘representation’ at pride parades. The relation between Globo (capitalism) and Homo (sexuality) is far beyond my scope as a humble traditional games enthusiast, so I will merely implore my reader to look at Spandrell’s excellent Bioleninism essays.

Wizards of the Coast isn’t just involved in passé leftist activism like pride parades, but also is on the cutting edge of pedophile acceptance! Of course, I overblow, but WOTC affiliates did certify a sex offender among others in their judge program for magic the gathering. A simple explanation for non-nerds here is that a subsidiary of the 4th largest toy company in the world allowed not one but several convicted sex offenders to act for it in a semi-official capacity at corporate-sponsored tournaments. While they currently claim to background check future judges, they also claimed that they didn’t associate with sex offenders when the allegations first were revealed, so take their word like you would any corporate HR drone’s.

Of course, liberal capitalism lacking the enthusiasm of the common man when it comes to tracking down pedophiles isn’t surprising, but there is always independent publishing right? I suppose so, you could always go play games designed by Monte Cook games, who published a consent in gaming document and checklist for ensuring nobodies feelings are hurt while playing. And if all this talk of consent sounds like weird perversion to you, it should as the document was co-authored by Shanna Germain a writer of BDSM literature (google it if you need proof, I’m not linking it here).

So, if all your options right now are nasty mega corporations and independent perverts, where can you go? I suppose you could go back to old school D&D and play some of the older modules with your friends! You know some of those old modules were made by companies that are still around, and are occasionally reprinted by their companies, like Judges Guild…

Oh.

2 Comments Add yours

  1. Earl Shetland says:

    So Monte Cook really hired a BDSM author? Sounds like a fatal mistake to me.

    Frog God has disowned Judges Guild and DriveThru RPG has removed them from the store.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. MikeRusade says:

    My theory is that FATAL was a demonic creation, something like a platonic basilisk, which once it was seen and siphoned from the void, and then unleashed upon the world, was fated to slowly draw every other RPG effort toward its event horizon

    Liked by 1 person

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