Submitted by WM Briggs

People like to have electronic toys. The best way of producing them is to put men who know all about electrons to work making these toys.

Wait a second. Change “know all about” to “know most about.” Nobody knows all about electrons. There is a vast, and maybe even infinite, number of things yet to learn about electrons.

The best way to do this learning is the obvious: set those men who have the highest aptitude for learning about electrons to studying the subject and pay them well. Identify who these men are as boys and begin teaching them early, and see who has the talent and enthusiasm for the subject.

Now, if you instead despised electronic toys and wanted to sabotage the process, the best way to do that is to force the boys who want to be electronists to also learn about gender identity, grievance, “racism”, bad poetry, Whig history condemning science as white supremacist, and similar subjects. Make him spend half his time on these debilitating subjects, insisting that if doesn’t give the required answers to exams on these areas, then he will not be allowed to become an electronist. Even if he’s good at it.

If he complains, tell him these indoctrination sessions will make him a well rounded person.

The sessions, because they are mandatory, pay via tuition the salaries of the quota hires colleges were forced to employ to avoid being sued for “discrimination.” It was never enough just to hire women professors, they also had to be given something to do. And that something was to annoy and harass people who only wanted to become electronists.

The original reason for college was sound: train men in the ways of the scholar and the pursuit of Truth, all Truth being from God. That purpose still exists, and the need is just as strong as ever. Which is to say, it is not that strong. This calling is only for the very, very few. We need, in a country of our size, perhaps four institutions devoted to training and housing scholars.

We also need electronic toys. Trade schools, which take in fresh boys of, say, thirteen, and spit out electronists at eighteen would fill our needs of men to make these toys. These trade schools would produce better electronists than the current practice of forcing boys to sit through four years of mind-numbing high school and four more of college, half of which is devoted to indoctrination.

We do not need to worry about these electronists not being “well rounded”, just as we do not worry that car mechanics are not “well rounded.” If electronists want to read, they will read, and they are less likely to read bad books when on their own. If they do not read, they won’t. Why worry about it?

Naturally, we can expand trade schools to cover every subject that requires memorization and facility with a deep background of facts. Medicine, math, chemistry, priests, hairdressing. Whatever. The hairdressing is not a joke: we need good barbers (England in particular does). Priests and hairdressers already have their own trade schools, as does medicine and law, but entrance is inefficiently and inexplicably restricted only to the indoctrinated, except for hairdressers.

We also need car mechanics, plumbers, carpenters, surveyors, people who can wrestle PowerPoint to produce slide “decks” to annoy people with at meetings in megacorps.

All of these things, indeed everything but becoming a scholar, could be done faster, better, cheaper, and with less political manipulation at tech or trade schools. If Intel was smart, they’d fund their own, requiring those that graduate to work for them a certain number of years. The students would emerge without astronomical debt, and without anything stuck up their nether regions to demonstrate their commitment to Pride.

If there is an interest in a trade school for grievance studies, why, they can create one for that, too. As it is, a griever emerges from a college with a “degree” which tells its holder she is much smarter and more deserving of respect than she really is. Just as the blubber, piercings, and blue hair dye hide her beauty, the “degree” disguises her mental weaknesses. Colleges are the Dr Frankensteins who created the army of monsters, Karens and Karls, who think they know something because a piece of paper says they do.

We barely listed the benefits of defunding colleges and universities. It would eliminate the farce of “amateur” sports, it would cancel High school, it would keep schools lean and as free as possible from infiltration, it would lessen publish or perish, it would to some extent lift the weight of government influence over research. Kids get jobs and start families earlier, without all that de rigueur campus “experimentation”.

Even if none of that is true, there are scarcely any weakness to the plan. It therefore has no chance whatsoever of being implemented—until the restoration.